The Dark Night of the Soul, Ego Death, and Spiritual Awakenings
This topic is one that I find extremely interesting and one which holds a very special place in my heart. I hadn’t heard of any of these terms even three years ago, but they resonated extremely deeply with me the moment I discovered them. My extremely logical brain was telling me that it was all a bunch of malarkey, but my soul told me otherwise. It just felt so right. If you are on the journey to discovering your own Spiritual Awakening, I encourage you to really explore it further and allow your own intuition to guide you to your true journey. If you are skeptical or on the fence about the whole notion, what do you have to lose by simply opening your mind a little to the possibilities of what’s out there?
Dark Night of the Soul
The Dark Night of the Soul is exactly what the name implies. It is the darkest hour or period of the soul in which there is usually immense suffering or anguish. It is the period in a person’s life where things are at their absolute worse, and you can clearly call it rock bottom. The way it presents itself is different for every person, but the underlying similarity is that things are bad. Really bad.
For people like me and those on a similar path as me, it can present itself as challenging health issues. For others, it can present itself as a period of time in which nothing works out for them in their careers or financially. A once seemingly secure life is no longer secure, and they find door after door closing in their face. They are qualified, have the skills, determination, drive, and the opportunities are out there, but just not for them. And yet for others, it might be the sudden loss of a loved one or any number of life’s circumstances that puts them in a place they never expected to be. Their life is on hold, and there seems to be no way out of it.
If you are experiencing the Dark Night of the Soul, it can undoubtedly be the hardest thing you have ever experienced in your life. It can be deep, it can be dark, and it can be scary. It feels like your life is over, and in a way, it is. The Dark Night of the Soul is actually your soul’s realization that the life you have been living is no longer in line with your true self; that you are not on purpose with what you are meant to do with your life. Quite too often in life, we become caught up in living a life we think that we are meant to live based on values we inherited, yet which often are not our own. We lose sight of our own true values, and what really makes us happy and bring us the highest joy.
Even if you don’t recognize this consciously, your soul and higher self does. It recognizes that you have strayed from who truly are. As a result of this, your higher self will give start giving you hints of other possibilities for you and your life. As we either fail to listen or act on these hints, things will get worse and worse, and nothing you try or do will help until you finally come to the realization that it is time for a change.
Ego Death
The Dark Night of the Soul is the realization that your old life is no longer serving you, and the Ego Death is the way for you to transition out of this way of living. As the name implies, Ego Death is literally the death of your ego. It is the next step of your journey in which you must begin to look and search deep within to make the changes necessary to ultimately become in line with your true self or higher self.
The biggest hindrance to expressing your true joy and true purpose is your own ego, and all the subsequent conditions and beliefs that stem from it. The key is to begin examining these beliefs and slowly start to shed the ones that aren’t yours one by one. Which are the ones society has imposed on you and which are the ones you truly believe? Why is what you think important really important to you? I once asked one of my friends why he doesn’t have a Facebook, and he simply replied, “Why would I waste my time on people who mean nothing to me when I barely have time for the people I care about in real life?” That left a profound effect on me and made me really reconsider what my priorities were.
A really simple way to understand what your true beliefs are and what beliefs are inherited, is to simply ask what the 5 year old version of you would think and believe. Would the 5 year old version of you think that money is the be all and end all? Would the 5 year old version approve of the reasons you are working whatever job your are currently working? What would the 5 year old version of you say if he or she knew how you viewed and treated other people? As you slowly work through all these aspects one by one, you slowly come to realize that the way you were living was quite conditioned and perhaps even a little silly.
In addition, acceptance of your circumstances as your own is paramount to overcoming the shadows that plague you. Rather than fighting everything that is happening and looking for an alternative way out of it, observe it, sit with it, and internalize it. Know that this is what is happening and although you don’t like it and can’t change it at the moment, it is okay. The more you resist, the more it persists. Once you accept and surrender however, things will quickly change. Now this doesn’t mean to ever stop trying, but rather approaching things from this new perspective.
Spiritual Awakenings
The Dark Night of the Soul and Ego Death are all stages of a Spiritual Awakening in which you make the transition from your old conditioned life to the life you were meant to live. As you slowly shed these old ideas and habits, you will find yourself beginning to understand what’s really important, and it is quite liberating. And as you begin to work on yourself more and more, you will slowly find yourself coming out of the Dark Night of the Soul and more towards your true purpose or highest joy. The world around you begins to change as the world inside of you changes. It is a shift to a higher level of consciousness and understanding of yourself and life.
As you begin to transition away from your old beliefs and conditions that you were living by, the question inevitably becomes, “what is my purpose and how do I get there?” For anyone who is truly experiencing a Spiritual Awakening, the reason is always to serve a higher purpose.
The first half of this higher purpose is always to find the thing in life that brings you the highest joy possible. Rather than doing what you think is acceptable or what society thinks you should be doing, what is the one thing in life that will allow you to fully express yourself? What will bring back that 5 year old profound sense of wonder, amazement, and excitement about the world? What is it that you could be doing with your life where 15 hour days are a breeze because you absolutely love what you are doing? Where you can run on 5 hours of sleep because you can’t wait to get back to work? What would you be doing if there was no fear to hold you back? The key here is to find something that you are actually truly passionate and love, rather than making the mistake of thinking it’s something you like because of all the things associated with it, such as wealth or prestige. Once you find this true passion and joy in life, everything else around you will change. You are now resonating at the highest frequency possible, and your circumstances will mirror that frequency.
The second half of this higher purpose is always to help others, improve on what already exists, and to leave the world a better place than you found it. This doesn’t necessarily mean that you must drop everything and devote your life to helping others. It simply means to operate from a place of true love and compassion for others and the world around you. The way the 5 year old version of you did. In fact, you can do whatever it is your heart desires, whether it be a doctor who wants to help others, or a singer hoping to bring happiness or joy to others by your art. It is about operating from a place of love, rather than ego.
Ironically however, you will find that by following your true joy and your true passion, you inevitably improve upon the world and the lives of others even without trying. All of the greatest contributions to the world and human condition have always come from people operating from their true joy. From Mozart giving us some of the greatest music ever, to Isaac Newton giving us the laws of motion, gravity, optics, and calculus, all the way to Steve Jobs bringing us some of the most revolutionary technology and trends. None of these people set out to make the world a better place as a primary objective, but they inevitably did as a result of their passions nonetheless. Do what you love, and you will automatically make the world a better place. I’m sure the 5 year old you would approve.
Where Do I Go From Here?
The answer is simply only you know and only you can figure it out. It isn’t much help and can be really hard, but this is ultimately your soul's journey and no one can tell you what your path is except for yourself. It can be a very difficult journey filled with much frustration, confusion, and won’t be easy, but nothing worth doing ever is. Just know that when you are able to get through it, it will be the most fulfilling experience ever.
Throughout it all, trust your own intuition and use it to guide you as you leap from rock to rock, trying to find your way to the other side of the pond. Your higher self is always trying to guide you. You just need to listen. Keep a positive mindset even when you want to cry and know that you will get through it. You are a force to be reckoned with, and only you can stand in your own way. Your greatness awaits you.
Still Unsure?
If you are still skeptical or aren’t completely sure what to believe, that’s okay. You don’t have to buy into the notion of a higher self, a greater good, or the cosmos conspiring to lead you to a path of virtue. Nonetheless, you can still apply the lessons to your life. Use this and every opportunity that comes to you as a learning experience, no matter how bleak the circumstances may be. They might suck, but given that it is what you are dealt, why not see if you can gain some positive from it?
Use this otherwise negative experience and see if you can elevate your own self and become a better person from it. Take it as an opportunity to discover who you really are and what you are really about. Life is short. Why not do what it is you truly love in life and make the world a better place at the same time?
At the end of the day, it is the same difference. The lessons are universal, even if you call it by a different name. Above all, know that you too will get through it, and that you will come out a stronger person.
I wish you the very best.
